Don't go on holiday. Do THIS instead...

Don't go on holiday. Do THIS instead...

Are you going on a holiday this year? Don’t bother. You can get a better experience by staying in Ireland and buying a BiteSize treat for yourself instead.

Here’s the evidence:

Holiday abroad

  • Costs an arm and a leg
  • Ryanair
  • Airport queues
  • Passport needed
  • Possible vaccinations
  • No BiteSize treats available

BiteSize treat

  • Does not cost a body part
  • No Michael O’Leary anywhere
  • Very short queues, often none
  • No passport needed
  • No vaccinations (It’s not 2020)
  • Endless supply of BiteSize treats

That seems pretty convincing to us. BiteSize wins. Stay at home.

But which treat should you choose as a substitute for your holiday destination? We’ve put together a handy guide below.


12 delicious and perfectly baked Portuguese custard tarts

We don’t want to cause a breakdown of diplomatic relations between Ireland and Portugal, but everyone says our Portuguese custard tarts are better than anything you can get in Portugal.

Even people who have actually been to Portugal say so.

So save yourself the expense of going all the way there for disappointing pasteis de nata and buy some of ours instead:

Better Portuguese custard tarts than they have in Portugal



A luxury box of a selection of 12 artisan sweet canapés. Each one looks like a mini cake or cupcake.

France is home of the sweet canapé, which they call petit fours for some reason—possibly because they are French, but we’re just guessing.

At this point, we’d like to remind you of Thierry Henry’s blatant handball on 18th November, 2009, during the second leg of Ireland’s play-off against the French during our heroic bid to qualify for the 2010 World Cup, which we would have won if we had got there, but we didn’t because of Henry’s basketball routine in the lead up to France’s winning goal.

So you could go to France. Or you can do the right thing:

Sweet revenge canapés


The Netherlands

White chocolate and raspberry cheesecake made up as a birthday cake


The Netherlands has a reputation for selling something that you can’t easily get in Ireland. Not that it’s banned as such over here. It’s just a bit difficult to lay your hands on, if you know what we mean?

That’s right: Dutch cheese. Edam, Gouda, Rotterdamsche Oude, that sort of craic. (Why, what were you thinking?)

But you don’t need to go to the Netherlands for cheese*. We make plenty of the stuff here in Ireland, including cream cheese*, which we turn into delicious cheesecakes*.

BiteSize cheesecake

* Our legal team would like to point out that when we say ‘cheese’ we mean actual cheese—and not anything else.



Rectangular wedding anniversary cake with a chocolate ganache on top and decorated with chocolate decorations and edible flowers.

It’s corny to say that everything in America is BIG, but sorry, it is. Just compare the size of their president to ours.

The supersized nature of the place makes the USA a magnet for the rest of us, and it’s one of the top holiday destinations for us Irish. In fact, sometimes we enjoy our holiday so much over there, we’re very slow to come back. You could say we like to ‘supersize’ our holiday. (Worth a go, when you’re talking to the border people.)

But there are BIG things to enjoy in Ireland too. Just check out our traybake cakes, which can give you up to 40 European-style servings (that’s a whole 12 US servings!):

US-sized traybake cakes


 The UK

 A luxury cake topped with lots of huge chocolate curls, meringue swirls, edible flowers, summer fruits.

The UK is probably our biggest overseas destination. And why not? Sensible Brits acknowledge the country has become some kind of ghoulish theme park that provides endless entertainment for everyone else on the planet. You may as well cash in on it and turn the whole mess into a tourist attraction, they say.

But amidst the chaos, one British tradition remains standing tall. It has survived many Prime Ministers, seismic social upheaval and even a change of figurehead. Yet nothing has been able to shake this foundation of Britain. That’s right, there will be a 15th season of Bake Off.

You don’t have to go to the UK to get your Showstopper fix, though. You can buy one right here:

BiteSize's Showstopper



Tapas on a table with beer

Photo by Alexandre Trouvé on Unsplash

The Spanish are famed worldwide, but especially in Spain, for their tapas. Small savoury treats, often served in bars and consumed with a nice glass of wine or beer. Really, you have to travel to Spain to enjoy them.

For the time being…

Word to the wise. If you haven’t booked your trip to Spain yet, save yourself the money. Our sister shop Bernie’s in Midleton will soon be open in the evenings and serving tapas. We’ll let you know when that happens.

Bernie's on Instagram


RedFM Reminder

REMEMBER: throughout June, July and August, BiteSize will be appearing on RedFM. And every Monday, there’s a chance of being a Monday Munchies winner. Just look at how happy these winners are:

That could be you. Unless, you are abroad on holiday. Then it won’t be you. And you won’t be happy. You’ll be sad. Your holiday will be ruined. Seriously, why run the risk? Save yourself the disappointment and just don’t go on holiday. And spend all your holiday money here instead:

BiteSize's online shop 


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